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Friday, March 30, 2007
sigh, just wait for my bad news around this time tomorrow. i will try my best, no doubt. but i really cmi. aiyah, i really dunno why i ALWAYS sleep in class! :( its just really drowsy...... esp for bio and chem! its like SLEEP TIME! charmaine liyi and i ponned bio to eat orange bowl after the disastrous math test.... haha if peiyi was here we sure dont dare! two weeks ago on saturday night i was feeling kinda pessimistic, sort of sad but still bearing some bouts of hope in my stomach. tonight im totally depressed, sullen and feeling hopeless throughout my body. and my tooth is aching. anyway, just wait for the bad and predictable news lah. Thursday, March 29, 2007 ahhhh, i realise my fahrenheit post is erased off the mainpage :( i can only read it when i open the archives! the content based tests are over. its ss sbq and math tomms. im damnit stupid. why am i so affected by this :( its got like nothing to do with me when the thing is changed, but it just affects me like shit. im scared, stressed, saddened, and no words from people around me can cure. i mean, it could be my self esteem, my lack of confidence to do well in these sort of things and even though im mentally prepared and am very contented, but still.... :( they have been saying all sorts of things to cheer me on, but i can see in their eyes(most) that they are just merely trying to comfort me, consolate me, make me feel better. but who will know my strengths more than me? i know im a hard nut to crack. im sorry. its coffee night today again. nice weather this afternoon, we were all pampered by the storm winds blowing through the window. props making were quite a waste of time.... cos there werent enough brushes to go around. im guilty and ashamed for forgettign to bring the stuff needed :( paiju was very weird cos we only had 2 yanyuans today plus we were sharing room with the clarinet section from band. in the end we ended up gossiping lah (after we realise its useless to pai cos chuanping cannot absorb already). retold the famous story. voiceless. saturday die. Wednesday, March 28, 2007 im useless. certified. i cant run. hurrrr. received an email from the css management about reschedule of time :// saw their contact number and realise the call i received today was not a prank call ahahah! so why did i hear a shriek? feel like putting toothpicks in my eyelids to keep my eyes open. adamkhoo replied the email, by the way. the one from i-did-it@akltg.com. felt happy, though i know its some computer generated email hahaha. i hate running. thats something people who can achieve those minimal targets wont understand. because no matter how hard i try, how much effort i put in, i wont hit the target. training really doesn help when i have a useless lung you see. i wont even pass napfa this year. whats the point Tuesday, March 27, 2007 finally, ms choo started chasing me for my homework. been in a terrible mood for the day, cant remember why but got easily irritated by almost everyone today. nosebled again during cca, ah irritating. see lah! thats what happens when yall force me to sing. hahaha! while going home today, in the car, something funny happened. was just looking everywhere and suddenly when i turned to my left to look out of the window i saw three hands waving madly at me - belonging to june, jiayun and yingteng! hahahah, so funny. they were so excited! ugh, quite bothered about some stuff. a few stuff lah. and wheres my coffee? i need the caffeine tonight. Sunday, March 25, 2007 the tooth that is growing is not making any progress, but just aching in the background. grow out leh. if ure a wisdom tooth, pls dont ache, pls hurt. spent 5 hours studying after flute today. ahaha, yes. my eyes are blur already, seriously. math homework STILL doesn appeal to me :( even yue du ji cheng as struck up an interest for me, but not math. why why why (everyone knows why but its just not nice to announce it in cyberspace) choosing. Saturday, March 24, 2007 its just... my luck, sigh. so today i did something i'd never done nor dreamt of doing before. not only i said i love you to my parents, i announced that to half the cohort and their parents as well. i hope they(my parents) felt special, felt moved, all those. i didnt regret what i did, even though the results were really sucky. but i got to know that will never be changed. i may never express my love for them ever again. now, its up to them. i didnt regret going for the course. instead, i felt regretful for those people who did not join the course. everyone should take it up, no matter how motivated you already are. its really really amazing. Friday, March 23, 2007 walking around in the canteen with masking tape on our forehead with very nice comments was kind of..... great. but very AA -___- 2nd day. the day passed so fast, it zoomed. i ate alot, its time to cut down on my eating :// smellyfish. hope ben is well! hope everyone is well. jiayou jiayou. Thursday, March 22, 2007 so the result of todays workshop. very motivated. and very tired. the feeling of walking around school at 9+ pm was cool though, and even more shiok when i freaked liyi out by the sheer imagination of her waking up in the middle of the night and seeing herself doing work in the dark on the table beside her.... (i bet you hundred dollars if she read this at night she sure shut off her com right away and go to sleep) okay so im convinced i ought to be optimistic and positive about.... the upcoming stuff, lets say. orange bowled two times today, satisfied. i wont eat it tomorrow. im not as scary as ziqin. mons and liyi started having this name calling thing going; mons was what, fungi? and liyi was.... algae -_- not bad, same class in sec2 for a few weeks never talk, can suddenly bond in sec four. all because of superstar -_- ahahaha. i feel like crapping alot alot today. because im bursting of crap. smiling makes ur body secrete endorphine which makes you less stressed! -smiles with a tink!- the trainer ramesh told a very funny and memorable joke today. "i was going around during the lunch break and i saw a few girls under the sun and not in the canteen; i asked them "why yall not eating?", the girls said "we're on a diet." i was like "this is not called a diet. this is called PHOTOSYNTHESIS!"" and another; "i had a rather uhh -shows round with hands- friend and he said he was on a seafood diet(meaning he only eats seafood). so i asked him "then why are you still this size?" and he said "seefood diet what, i see food then i eat see food then i eat lorh!" fainttttttt. the company is darn rich! from what we paid, we got two manuals, a sketchpad and a set of six coloured metallic pens. goodness, all with their own company brand and name! okay okay i admit defeat im tired, shant crap anymore, shall crap in my dreams. heh (that was kinda childish but according to some personality test, i was told im only 20percent childish which was pretty good! karen angeline liyi charmaine cheryl are 99percent childish, how cool is that) Wednesday, March 21, 2007 adam khoo's workshop tomorrow; 8am to 9pm -_- want to sleep early today but i'd be wasting away my study time, homework time, blahhhhh. been feeling real guilty sigh. lax conscience -_- -______- laypeng's favourite face. paiju today was cute lah. hei si dai jiayou! Tuesday, March 20, 2007 oycmmm. but you'll never know. and i'll never tell you. i get more irritated by someone by day. anyway, pls pls pls dun bear hope i will go into 3rd round. just be prepared for the worse! i am NOT GOING TO GET IN. keep it in mind people, so you wont be disappointed. even with my aspirations to do homework in school AND at home, my determination and stamina failed me :( home = sleep, sch = sleep, so non sleeping times are left for 1. some lessons and 2. paiju. gahhhhh. i really dont want to sleep in class :( but i cannot control. been losing touch with my flute! and my music T___T i want shi jian! revisited my kimjeonghoon album today. reminiscent! wu xie ke ji as well. -starts rapping- bio bio bio bio geog geog geog ss ss ss ss ss mug mug mug boo. Monday, March 19, 2007 spread like wildfire. so much work to complete. im a goner. concentrate! Sunday, March 18, 2007 its just like a dream come true. im very very contented (: thanks thanks to the ppl who came down to support, laypeng liyi monica charmaine jacq chuanping jiayi danfong kelly newfriend :)) love all of you, ur screams soothed me while i went on :) and many of ur moral support! i realise many people tend to spell css as ccs..... thats like my cca hahahah :D (points to my tagboard) its time to concentrate on school work. Saturday, March 17, 2007 all the best. no hopes = no disappointment right? goodness, back after a few days (felt very long) thanks to the people who tagged! i shall be more :) :) :) Tuesday, March 13, 2007  Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net ugh. ugh. ugh. told laypeng my optimist views. which are true to myself but i dont really feel like practising that at the moment. my blog is getting sianer and sianer and im dying more of living in front of the comp. sore eyes. meaning i keep seeing things i dont want or shouldn see lah. so thankful hurr. i hate the computer. the thing that destroys relationships. the thing that controls people's minds. the thing that makes people feel as if you could just die without but in actual fact, die faster with it around. seven levels of tension; im at tragedic goodness. or catatonic. the extremes.  Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net Monday, March 12, 2007 feel like doing silly stuff. im broke, kinda. after the sakae. no kbox today. was sad. many sad/angry people today. i understand. but must look up. this is huangcheng day.  weiling jieying charmaine and i at singapore river. the bridge!
 cheers to carolanne! she's so pretty :)Saturday, March 10, 2007 i failed. i still failed. its so, bitter. i've let you people down, again. its so called my fault too. i failed. Thursday, March 08, 2007 im just a bunch of worries and fear all day. i want to change my song again. not fickle, but just having too many things happening at the same time. everywhere, i can say. even hanging dadong tag on my nametag today didnt have any cheering effect. im sorry karen, i realise im always using for tissue, for lots of things, sweat, blood and tears. hahha. my tissue supplier :D sorry and thanks so much (: esp for ur concern. and to all those who cared, thanks. to those who didnt, haha.... was just thinking again, that at least my emotions wont affect how i treat other people. i will still try to zheng qu. will fight till my very last breath. for the sake of those people i dont want to hurt again. Tuesday, March 06, 2007 after being so estatic that i found my e zuo ju zhi wen disc two, i found out that i lost my last disc of the show. the sweetest ending to this wonderful show, i lost it. i was depressed when i found out yesterday, and im still depressed today. sigh. searched high and low and felt worse when i couldn find it :( i dont care, im gonna buy another one if i dont find it in one week's time (im gonna conscientiously look for it every night for the next week!) all tests are over for the week (excluding chinese) and im hardly estatic (cos of my e zuo ju zhi wen, sigh and whines). the only thing that made me laugh or smth was that quite a few of my classmates said i look like dadong! expression wise. goodness, i didnt know whether to laugh or be happy. :D:D tired. not gonna do work today. e zuo ju zhi wen..... -depressed- Sunday, March 04, 2007 if you find the blogsong playing like twice simultaneously with different timing, just refresh and it'll be alright (: i love tank, and i love school. lets hope we can all grow to love our ju too! and oh, i love math.... so much... camp was okay. great because i had honghwee and cecilia in my group! peiwen and lynn too, all familiar ppl (: got high doing pmb idol(which we won!) as well as the discussion between attendance monitors. my imitation of a certain teacher did not go unnoticed... knew more ppl, and did some stupid stuff. cheers grp 3! cecilia, huimin, honghwee, natalie, ainsley, lynn, peiwen, andrea, alyssa, diana! argh, loci sucks. new song, 岚 by tank :) |
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